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Frustrated with my brain a blog
自分の頭脳にうんざりして、ブログ June 14, 2026 2026年6月14日 Do you know how hard it is for someone like me to realize their brain no longer works efficiently? I’m a Gemini- we are smart communicators who love learning because we retain it and use it. I have always loved learning so much so that my motto used to be-…
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Grief does not have a linear timeline
悲しみには、決まった流れというものはありません June 12, 2026 8:13 pm 2026年6月12日 午後8時13分 I was going to write a blog about my first impressions of the new NUL album- Artifact. (which is amazing by the way!) NULのニューアルバム『Artifact』の第一印象についてブログを書こうと思っていたんです。（ちなみに、このアルバムは最高ですよ！） But instead, I need to talk about something that makes many people uncomfortable. Because it’s not light and happiness. It’s truth in the…
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Well, fuck I’m 50… now what?
May 29, 2026 3:43 pm Ah, the first day of my vacation. I actually slept in, until 5 am. My body thought I was late for work and told me it was time to be awake. I don’t mind. I try to keep on my work sleep schedule, even on my normal weekends. The tendency…
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Trying to find the silver lining
In a life that keeps throwing darkness at me May 23, 2026 blog At 2:30 pm “Stop people pleasing!” Bestie said today. I was talking about how sad I was that my headphones were broken, and now I had to use the bluetooth speaker and play my music out loud. Sometimes I need my Capricorn…
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Part 2 of Broken Open by Rapture
May 15, 2026 7pm Not a continuance of the chaos of yesterday. This is clarification after some desperately needed sleep. And yes I realize my need to clarify and explain is a trauma response. I will still write this follow up blog because I don’t want to be thought of as unhinged or crazy. My…
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Broken Open by Rapture
May 14, 2026 5:57 pm Where do I even begin? Sixteen long years since Despairs Ray made new music. It seems a lifetime ago. I mourned deeply. And now, I’m not sure how to feel… obviously joyous because they are reborn. But I truly grieved the loss of them as a band (as many fans…
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May 2 and 3 2026
I know it’s been awhile. Life has been a roller coaster lately. I’ve been at my place of employment for over 4 years now. And I’m currently on my 6th manager. I struggle to connect with authority on a good day, but the constant changes in the hierarchy are astoundingly annoying. Our latest manager is all…
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February 14, 2026
Five years ago today, my mother, Virginia passed away. It was also her and her second husband’s anniversary. When it happened, I had already lost my longtime best friend, Lisa, and my father’s mother, Doris in the previous two months. April 13, 2019, my mother’s mother, Dorothy passed away. Only a year and 10 months…
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February 8 2026
I haven’t finished a painting or written anything in so long. No motivation, no inspiration. I’ve been in survival mode. Just existing. I wasn’t even enjoying music anymore. Or the simple joy of a beautiful sunrise or fresh fallen snow. I only crocheted to use up yarn, make useful things, and to control the anxiety,…
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LISA ANNIVERSARY BLOG
December 18, 2025 The year was 1981, and I was five years old. The two kindergarten classes would sometimes get together for music or story time. I was a painfully shy child who didn’t make friends easily. But then I saw the girl with short brown hair (just like mine) wearing the same exact denim…